Envy – Breath of Life Women’s Ministries

by Michelle Welch

As I sat watching my hermit crabs, I became aware of chaos in the tank. It seems that one of the newer crabs has decided that he wants the house of another crab. Now, in the hermit crab world, changing houses is a rather common occurrence. I leave empty shells in the tank and it’s not unusual for the crabs to change their minds several times about where they want to live. it seems however, that this crab is not happy with his house. He wants the house of a younger, handsomer crab who moved to a house that is just a tad bit bigger than he can handle. But….it is his house and he is determined to keep it under any circumstances.

Crabs do make noise (not often heard unless they live right next to your desk) and the squeals of anger are quite noticeable. Of course I don’t speak crab so I can only assume its anger. When one crab is standing over the other one trying to pry him from his home, I would doubt he is asking him out for coffee. Especially when the larger one takes the smaller one to the top of the hill in the tank and pushes him off, resulting in a shrill screech from the smaller crab.

It occurred to me how often this kind of envy occurs in my own life. I have a nice comfortable home. If I don’t like it, I do have the option of finding another home. What usually occurs however is that I see someone else’s home and decide that is what I want for myself. (or clothes or car or insert anything else here that causes envy) I begin to think that I am deserving of that home until my desire clouds all my rational thought, making me willing to do just about anything to get what I think I need.

Envy leads to unrighteous desire which, when you can’t have what you want, leads to anger which destroys everything in its path. In scripture James 3:16 tells us that “For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder”. Envy by its very definition means that you are not satisfied with what you have been given. Stop and think for a moment what heartbreak this brings to our Abba. His gifts to you are being rejected, cast aside in your quest for something more.

When I was growing up there was a poster that said “God doesn’t make junk”. I also think He doesn’t give junk either. Every single gift that you have, every single moment of your life, is something that He picked out especially for you. He doesn’t throw gifts up in the air and let them randomly settle down on whoever is within reach. He created you, thoughtfully gave gifts to you that He knew you would need, and set you out on a course that will bring you joy if you but do His will and accept what He has in store for you.

I need to take what He has given me to work with, whether I think it is too little or too much, and use it to bring glory to His name. I need to stop looking around to see if I am missing out on things and enjoy the very precious things that He lays out in front of me every day. Even though my life is full of chaos and sorrow right at this moment, He has promised me riches beyond compare if I will just hold fast to the things He has asked me to do.

Dearest Father God, let me take this envy from my life and cast it far from me. Help me to sink deep in Your Words every day and find the peace that You have for me. Let me use the wisdom You have promised me as I read and learn and grow in the life that You have chosen just for me. Cover me with Your mercy and grace as I am coming to understand that the things in my life are for me. Not for her or her or her. Nor should I desire what she has for I do not have the ability to use my gifts to live her life. I can only use Your gifts to live my life. In the name of my amazing brother, Christ Jesus, Amen